How good are you at accepting blame when you’ve messed up…
🌱Do you find yourself blaming your partner a lot of the time for something that’s happened when you know it was your fault?
🌱Is it only ever partly your fault and someone else always has to be responsible also?
🌱Does the phrase “Yeah I did that but you also did….” get said?
First step in a healthy relationship is knowing when to accept blame and what to do afterwards. Think about your words and actions and understand what part you have played leading up to this point.
Admitting fault does not make you weak, in fact, it is a strength. It shows maturity, courage and self-awareness.
Check out these 10 Top Tips on how to accept blame in the best way.
- Stop shifting the blame: You may not be the only person to blame in a given situation, absolutely! However, the best thing is to focus on yourself and your actions. Even if others do not own up to their mistakes, you will have accepted your wrongdoings and can move on.
- Address the situation sooner than later: Waiting to see how things play out is only going to prolong an already uncomfortable situation. The longer you wait, the worse it will get. Addressing your responsibility in this situation helps you move toward finding a solution quicker.
- Speak to your partner openly and honestly: Admitting your mistake shows you are aware of it, the fact that you are not perfect and that you are willing to work towards a solution.
- Apologise: If the situation requires it, then apologise. Accept your fault and make it clear to your partner who is affected that you are sorry for the trouble or hurt your actions have caused.
- Validate the your partners feelings: If the person affected by your actions is upset, understand and acknowledge their emotions, reactions and feelings rather than dismiss them. You might not get upset by the situation but it doesn’t mean that they aren’t.
- Whats your solution? In order to move on, you will need to come up with a solution that works for the both of you to feel better. This may mean changes in the future (not repeating the same mistake), or actions now (doing what you were initially suppose to do).
- Accept any consequences: Accepting you’re at fault may feel scary, especially knowing there may be consequences. But know that when the consequences are over, you are truly done. You have accepted your mistake, lived through the consequences, learned from it and moved on in your life.
- Reflect on your behaviour: Analyse the mistake you've made and understand the circumstances. Knowing what lead to your actions or inactions will help you improve yourself and never repeat the same mistake in the future.
- Get accountable: Have someone in your life who will keep you accountable for your words and your actions. Perhaps a friend, family member or coach who will call you out and meet with you regularly to talk about accountability.
- Move on from the situation: Nobody is perfect, we all make mistakes. Once you have gone through the steps of accepting blame, move on from it. Do not try to constantly make it up to the person you have hurt. Do not try to relive the situation and allow guilt to linger forever.
Start using these steps in your life and see how your relationship instantly improve. When BOTH individuals do this, it’s like magic!
Much love
Naomi & Martin ♥️
Your turn...
What else would you add to this list?
Which top tip are you going to start doing?
Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.